There are many paths to take after graduating from high school. If the choice is to attend college, it really doesn’t have to be the soul-crushing, high-stress ordeal that so many families report experiencing. Just keep these three things in mind: 1) there are close to 3,000 4-year degree-granting institutions out there; 2) when it comes to your child’s long-term success, his or her college’s fit is far more important than its ranking or selectivity; and 3) just breathe… it’s going to be ok. For instructions to view this page in Spanish, click on en Español.
Families Connected Resources
Students and their thoughts on college admissions stress
Seniors from the SBFC Youth Advisory talk about the stress of college admissions and give helpful advice to others who will soon be in their position. Recorded in April 2022.
When we asked students what stressed them out, a common theme emerged, the college admissions process.
Families Connected blogs
Jill Millstein
College Students: Are They Really Living Their Best Lives? by Jill Millstein
The College Admissions Pageant by Jill Millstein
The College Admissions and Selection Process: A Mindful Approach to Parenting by Kim Digiilio
Let’s Stop the College Madness by Helen Codron
Five Things I'd Wish I'd Known as a High School Parent by Stephanie J. Smith
Related resources for parents and guardians
Resources for teens
Curated Gallery of Resources
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National articles
Photo credit: Parent Tool Kit
Don’t Worry About the Rankings (Challenge Success)
Overloaded & Underprepared (Challenge Success)
AP and Honors Classes (Challenge Success)
Advice On Selecting A College From College President (and Dad) (Grown and Flown)
The Myth of the Ivy League (GreatSchools.org)
From Stressful Myths to Good Matches (Edutopia)
For Students Choosing College, It Takes a Village to Avoid the Prestige Trap (Challenge Success)
Parents Need to End the Stigma Surrounding Trade School (Grown and Flown)
Ten Benefits of a Gap Year Before College (Value Colleges)
Five Reasons to Attend Community College (U.S. News)
A Different Kind of College Prep (Challenge Success)
Preparing for College Emotionally Not Just Academically (Child Mind Institute)
I Don’t Care Where My Kids Go to College, Neither Should You (Grown and Flown)
Recommended books
If you are a parent who is listening to the voice of self-doubt because your friends are telling you that your son or daughter won’t succeed if he or she is not juggling three AP classes, there are plenty of experts who would recommend that you relax and let your kid enjoy high school. Please check out the following recommended reading selections:
Frank Bruni’s book, Where You Go Is Not Who You’ll be gives us a new perspective on the awful competition and a way out of the anxiety that it creates for all of us.
We also recommend How To Raise and Adult by Julie Lythcott-Haims, and Overloaded and Underprepared by Denise Pope. Please click on the link below to visit our recommended reading list at independent bookstore, Pages, to find these books and others.
The importance of fit over ranking
Challenge Success provides schools and families with the information and strategies they need to create a more balanced and academically fulfilling life for their kids. We highly recommend taking a few minutes to view their video below, visiting their website to access helpful resources, and reading A “Fit” Over Rankings.
Helping youth find the right fit
We highly recommend sharing the College Board’s Big Future webpage with your student. It is an outstanding way for your child to explore career options that align with their purpose/interests, to explore majors, and more. There’s also a great section on finding colleges that match up with your child’s interests and needs.
Many of our Families Connected Partner Schools have outstanding college counseling departments that provide Naviance, a comprehensive K-12 college and career readiness platform that enables self-discovery, career exploration, academic planning and college preparation for millions of students across all ages and around the globe. Your student will need an i.d. to use the website.
Instead of spending time on the U.S. World and News Report College Rankings site, check out Colleges That Change Lives. This an outstanding resource that bases its list on real measures that matter. (click on the CTCL image to access site)
Value Colleges offers a well-curated resource page, information on subjects and degrees, and numerical rankings of institutions and degree programs to help college-bound readers choose financially responsible paths. Rankings include online programs and community colleges, and best value by different degrees.
Stressed about test scores? Maybe you don’t have to be!
Click on the logo to hear NPR report that a growing number of selective institutions are saying test scores are simply not that important.
Fair Test provides a complete list of more than 1,000 colleges that support test-free admissions.
When college is not the right fit — There are many other paths to success
The United States Department of Labor provides an online occupational handbook where you can search a wide range of occupational groups, from architecture to transportation services, and learn the average pay, the necessary education level, number of new jobs, etc. It also provides an excellent resource guide to help with job readiness. It is a great tool for youth to explore their areas of interest, and to learn that many jobs do not require a college degree.
Value Colleges has an outstanding search tool for trade and vocational degrees. Trade and vocational training can make the difference between a lucrative career and struggling to make ends meet, since most high-paying trades require licensure and extensive training.
College Readiness
Did you know that 30% of college freshman will not return for their sophomore year? We don’t talk about it much, but many teenagers go away to college only to recognize — either because of their grades, their habits, their mental health or all of the above — that they’re not ready for college life. (The New York Times)
Transferring Schools
Transferring colleges can be complex and confusing. Research shows that 80% of community college students intend to transfer but fewer than a third actually do.
Despite the hurdles, transferring is a popular route to a four-year college and can be a great way to save money or move from a school that isn't a good fit. It can also offer you a different or new location and open up doors to career opportunities. (NPR)
For tips on how to transfer to a new school, click HERE.
Return to the Virtual Teen Center
For More Youth Wellness Resources, Visit:
For South Bay parents and caregivers
Go to the South Bay Families Connected landing page to view local events, the Teen Resource Center, to sign-up for the SBFC monthly parent e-newsletter, and more.
For parents and caregivers in the U.S.A.
Visit the Families Connected landing page for non-region-specific, free youth wellness online resources.